Concussion Recovery & Anniversary Dates
Since I have experienced many injuries throughout many years, I find I don't really know the exact dates of all my injuries, but this may not be the case for all. If you experienced one specific incident, such as a car crash that noticeably changed your life, anniversary dates might bring on many unforeseen symptoms and heightened emotions.
Different anniversary dates may make you feel all kinds of emotions. Feeling like you're still set back a few years after the incident or feeling angry about how much your life has changed is completely normal; please don't feel like you're alone with all of this. Anniversary dates may also cause you to be excited because your recovery has improved, or you have come to love the new person you have become.
Though specific dates may not be significant to me, certain times of the year used to be really hard, like when the equestrian competitive season starts up, and many of my friends would be sharing images of how excited they were to be back in the ring again. In past years I had removed myself from social media for a short period of time to keep myself from spiraling into a dark place. As the years have gone by, it has gotten easier as I have filled my life with many other things that I enjoy!
I believe the initial problem with anniversary dates is we often put too much pressure on ourselves, expecting so many things to change by a specific date. One of the most frustrating things about brain injuries is that everyone heals at different rates. Though it may seem like a year is a very long time in terms of brain injuries, it's often much shorter.
So if you have an anniversary date coming up, what should you do? I have come up with a few ideas to help make your anniversary date seem less of a burden. Each of these ideas will be affected by where you are in your recovery physically and emotionally either way I really hope they help you!
#1 Schedule The Day!
Plan some things out for the day to help keep your mind busy such as listening to that new audiobook, trying out baking, watching a new tv series, having a friend over, or going out for a bite to eat. Consider getting outdoors and taking a walk with a friend so you can talk to keep your mind from drifting. If it suits you treat yourself; book a massage, or get your nails done (If you can handle the smell). Distracting yourself is often a great way to keep emotions from controlling your day. Though make sure not to beat yourself up for having bad emotions, try your best to accept that they are there and move on with your day. Most importantly focus on yourself being relaxed and happy!
#2 Make A Progress List
Instead of focusing so much on how your life has changed, write a list of all of the progress you have made. No matter how small the progress may seem, every step we make is an important one. Some progress ideas could be you've gotten to know yourself better, you can now exercise frequently, you have discovered a trigger for pain management, you have increased your balance, you can now hang out with a few others, you can work part-time, you have discovered a way to help you remember things! Our progress lists will all look very different but here is my progress list for today compared to last year:
I started a podcast and business to help others
My bad thought days are nearly gone
I learned to put myself first
I learned to enjoy activities even when not being competitive
I learned to rest on good health days
#3 Reach Out/Get Help
Brain injuries can change the way we control our emotions. It's very important to realize when professional help might be the next step in your recovery. Speaking to a professional does not make you weak or any different from everyone else. The best thing professionals can do is give you tools to learn how to cope with the emotional roller coaster you may be on. Always remember that mental health is nothing to be ashamed of, and it is important that we speak to others who can help rather than keeping everything to ourselves. (Listen to our Mental Health episode here)
#4 Write Your Story/Share It
Writing out your story can help create some perspective as well as reading other's stories! Please consider sending us your story. We will be releasing a share your story section soon on the website for others to read (please feel free to send in your story anonymously as well). Sharing your story may help you and will definitely help others understand each other's similar circumstances. Even writing out your own story privately for personal reflection can aid in realizing how far you've come or create a new perspective on your own recovery.
#5 Have A Party! (Covid Permitting)
Now, this depends on where you live due to different Covid related rules, it may need to be a virtual or outdoor party! As mentioned before, this tip may strongly depend on your recovery and ability to handle certain environmental factors such as noise and crowds. An "I hate concussions" or "Celebrating recovery" party can be a great way to get some release and have some fun! Though a party doesn't need lots of people, even a small get together with a few close friends may be all you need to have a good anniversary date experience.
I hope one of a combination of these tips helps you get through your next anniversary date! Remember to reach out at any time.
One day at a time,
Bella
