Putting your Mental Health First

Feb 16

No one tells you what it's really like to live with depression. No one tells you about that aching feeling inside you that just wants to turn you into a ball and avoid the world.

I just quit school. I wouldn't say I like to use the word quit though, maybe took a step back or break is a better term. I had taken on too much and didn't realize the extent of how it was affecting my mental health. It wasn't until I sat for four days in front of my computer and got nothing done to accept that something needed to change. My mental health tanked. I canceled meetings. I wanted just to give up. I didn't want to record podcast episodes because how was I supposed to sound hopeful? When I was miserable. I started sleeping in and wanting just to sleep all day because I had no desire to do anything. I was overwhelmed; my body and my brain were burnt out. I had no free time to do anything else. I thought I could do it. I told myself I could, but that wasn't the case.

I wasn't going to share; I felt like a failure, but then I had to remind myself that's the whole purpose behind Post Concussion Inc is to show the truth and reality of how things can affect us mentally.

I had been getting a headache every day again after going months without them; between the stress and time on a screen, it was way too much for any person, even without post-concussion syndrome. I didn't want to continue to let my mental health suffer so that I could go to school. I hate quitting more than your typical person, but it's not quitting if it means putting myself first. I have been working on focusing on what's important to myself, and school is on that list! But a degree is not worth compromising my health. I need to want to get out of bed in the morning and start the day.

As my bestfriend told me,

"You're throwing 100% into your job. You can't throw 100% into two things and not burn out,"

which was the best way to look at it. A friend also mentioned that "the weekend is supposed to help you feel better; you should feel ready for the week Sunday night, not exhausted from working all day."

So this is just a small reminder not to be ashamed about things you can't do, even if it is for a short while. We can't do everything at once, and that's okay. It took me a long time to recognize when my mental health was starting to affect me, and I've gotten better at recognizing the signs, which allowed me to step back and make a change.

Signs your mental health may be suffering: